Monday, May 24, 2010


So, I’ve talked about Hurricane Jack before.


For those not familiar, Jack is my three year old.  Whom I adore and love and wish I could bottle.

But he’s a fucking nightmare on legs.


Right now, this very minute, there is what appears to be, a portion of crime scene police tape at the bottom of my toilet bowl.  And from what I can recall, there have been no mass murders in our street of late.   This of course, has only been placed there by Jack.  We are all on that toilet at some point during the day, yet the other four people in this family, to date, seem to have avoided collecting and thus, flushing, state evidence down the toilet.


Of late, my husband and I have been particularly challenged by Jacks behaviour.


I’m not sure if it started when he decided to pull a used tampon out of the toilet bowl (Note: not flushed so as not to disturb the sleeping family) and proceeded to fling it about the toilet walls, thus creating a scene Van Gogh would have happily cut off his own ear lobe to be remembered for. 

Perhaps it’s because he’s been in trouble 3 times now (big trouble) for attempting to clean the toilet himself with toilet gel and toilet duck whilst jamming entire toilet rolls down the S bend for good measure.  What kid doesn’t learn after the second time?


Or maybe it’s just because he let the kitten out of her room this morning because she was “prying” before anyone rose and then proceeded to scale the kitchen cupboards and get his “biatmins” (vitamins) out of the cupboard and down them. Then just to make sure there was no question he’d been out there, he drew on the chocolate leather lounge with a white oil pastel on his way back to bed.


It could be because he got into trouble at kindy for both cutting up his chair with his scissors and/or throwing a ball at the “babies”.


Or just because he’s a shit of a kid.  Or is he?

Lately I’ve been told more than twice, that Jack is simply an Indigo child.  What is an Indigo Child you ask?  It’s a bit new agey which hey, I kind of  immediately dismissed but I would certainly like a simple explanation as to why my three year old is so obviously different to my previous two children.  I am still sceptical.  But here goes:


"The Indigo Child is a boy or girl who displays a new and unusual set of psychological attributes, revealing a pattern of behaviour generally undocumented before. This pattern has singularly unique factors that call for parents and teachers to change their treatment and upbringing of these kids to assist them in achieving balance and harmony in their lives, and to help them avoid frustration”


Ok, so what behaviour are they talking about exactly?

~ Determined
~ Detect dishonesty from a mile away
~ Absolute confidence
~ They rarely need others to tell them who they are
~ Are easily frustrated with routine or ritual
~ Based activities that require no creative thought
~ They do not accept authority without explanation or choice
~ Non conformist
~ They have no trouble telling you what they need
~ May seem anti social if they are not around children like them 

~ Sensitive
~ Intuitive
~ Technologically orientated
~ Intelligent
~ Empathy for others yet not for stupidity
~ Amazing memory

Fucking tick.

Although they did forget to mention how he can screw up a perfectly cracking family day, with an unscheduled meltdown in the middle of a nice meal for no particular reason.


And I have to believe that this behaviour he displays, and look, you need to spend a day with him to believe how full on this child can be, is due to an ingrained trait ingrained at birth.  Because we have done nothing different than we did with his sister and his brother.  And before you write and tell me “hey, he’s only three”.  I know, OK.  He has some amazing and beautiful qualities, but when he slapping his older brother in the face for kicks, not one hour after getting into major trouble for the exact same thing, I think I’m qualified to make the call.


Right now though, I have a crime scene to hunt down.


Baloney said...

Oh boy. Sounds like a combo of my two boys and a whole lot like my nephew! Good luck!! It is exhausting keeping up with kiddos like that.

Leanne aka appletartlet x said...

Yup, I've been told many time I have one of those indigo children... Also know as spirited.....

Jen said...

And the terrible twos last until they are four lol! My 15 month old daughter is heading the way of your little fella, I don't know where I am going to get the patience/energy sigh. Any tips? Jen.

Wombat Central said...

Holy crime scene. Maybe he'll grow up to be CSI or a super creative person.

PS I need a song list from your blog. Love that first one, though I'll admit my pea brain doesn't always allow me to read and listen to it at the same time!

Kristy said...

Ugh, sigh. My boy sounds like yours already and he is only two. I am darkly realizing, we are in for it. We are in for it for a long time.

Lucy said...

He and Lexie would make a right pair. That list you have descibes her to perfection......

Katie said...

Deep breaths....lots of deep breaths....?!

Jewels Diva® said...

Okay, don't take this the wrong way, coz I don't know so I'm just asking, but....have you tried drugs?

Marita said...

Describes my Annie to perfection also, especially the toilet thing. I remember that driving me nuts from ages 3-5yo. She was trying to be ever so helpful cleaning the toilet from me, also I believe trying to figure out how the toilet worked. A very strong case of the 'I do it myself'.

kurrabikid said...

Our Family Day Carer described my boy as an Indigo Child too - I had to go look it up! Not sure if it was a compliment or not...!!

Thea said...

I looked up indigo child because someone mentioned that about my boy once!! Does he have dark, almost black eyes?? That way the 'give away' apparently.

I wish I had all the answers for you.
I'm crossing everything for you that he grows out of it. Three was THE WORST with our boy.

Anonymous said...

Charisevenn said...

In my opinion i don't know why you would suggest to a mother about medicating a child. This is clearly not the answer to this situation at all.

Jack is a beautiful boy who is very easy to fall in love with he just has a VERY cheeky side...

These are the best times of your lives and things you will be able to joke and laugh about at his 21st.

Fiona said...

I'm concerned that it could be very damaging to people to suggest (even jokingly) that their child might need to be medicated.

It's an age-old issue that some children are more 'full of beans' than others, inquisitive, curious and energetic. A handful for parents and exhausting, but all very much normal.

The 'Indigo' list of traits could also possibly describe a "Gifted" child (google 'Traits of Giftedness') or several other possible 'labels', or most likely just a full-of-beans, active kid. Only a check-up with a paediatrician would really clarify something like that...but...let kids be kids, at least till they mature a bit, like age 6 or 7.

So Now What? said...

Sorry, just come back to this. Couldn't agree more Fiona. I have absolutely no intention of medicating my child. He's three and he's a livewire. I guess here I was just trying to put it out there that I keep getting told by people he's an indigo child.

I'm still not sure what that really is to be honest, but all I know is that for all the hard bits, there are equal great bits :)

Thanks charise :)

Seraphim said...

I love you Bern. I loved you before but THIS post just made me cry. Because my almost 3 year old is so similar. My older two were raised the same way and yet Mr Small obviously took one look at our parenting manual and threw it in his sandpit.
Thank you for sharing his story. I know there is a great deal of humour embedded in your narrative, but equally I know the angst as well xxxx

Kylie L said...

Oh wow. That tampon bit.... wow. I can't even imagine. My own son didn't walk until 19 months and pretty much has always done what he was told, but my daughter threw the phone in the toilet twice and drank bleach before she was three. I have no advice whatsoever. Good luck!

So Now What? said...

Thanks guys. Not really sure what it says about me when the week has had two posts where a tampon is one of the main storylines. :)

Sarah said...

That's my five year old to a tee.

Jodie at Mummy Mayhem said...

Ok Bern - so Jack, Seraphim's almost 3yo and my 3yr old should, like, *never* be left alone in a room together. ESPECIALLY the bathroom.


So Now What? said...

Jodie, Agreed x

livinglifeasme said...

As a mum of an Indigo Child who is at the 16 yo end, I can say they are a handful, but, the insightfulness, the ability to love and their creativity is a joy to behold. You do need to parent them differently and you do need to stay in tune with them, but despite the problems they may cause you, the absolute joy they can bring is immense. Look deep into their eyes - you can see their souls.

And secondly, the Tampon thing. I'm worried about you Bern ;)

Linda T said...

My third child was very similar, like you I couldn't work out why he was so different to the other two. He's 19 now, he's a wonderful young man, but boy has he put me through some stuff!

My grandmother used to say "If he sat in a corner all day and did nothing you'd be worried" I knew she was right but I wished he would do that just one day to give me a break.

My only advice, is to stay as consistent as you can, don't see it as your failing and always love him regardless (which I know you will)