I write this as Maddison (10 turning 35) sits in her room and sulks. No doubt there are tears and silent curses that are inspired by me and a great deal of wishing herself into a world of glittering unicorns and cooler mothers.
To be honest, I always wondered when “it” would happen and now I know. “It" being, turning from a sweet girl into a hormonal tween who to quote Britney Spears , "Is not a girl, but not yet a woman”.
And the fact that she goes from calm to ridiculous in 0-30 seconds is what is spinning Phil and I out the most. More than once we have just turned and looked at each other and silently mouthed “WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!!!?” Hurricane Maddie, that’s what.
The smallest of events are setting her off. She goes postal when one of her brothers looks at the wrong way. She starts mean, convoluted rants directed at them for sitting too close to her on the communal couch. She is constantly telling me I am being “so unfair”. ZOMG you guys, you should see how she behaves when I have the audacity to tell her to hop off the computer. Then there’s the whine when at bedtime (a very generous bedtime I might add) that she hasn't stayed up long enough. You name it, I am the mother who is not only unreasonable in my requests to keep her room semi-clean, but also the very same that failed to produce her sisters instead of brothers.
To be fair, these explosions are only happening 25% of the time and have only started in the last 3 months or so. I get it, I mean I was a young lady with raging hormones once. Ask Phil and he’ll probably tell you not a lot has changed except I can no longer call myself a young lady.
Currently the sulk fest is due to the fact I’ve just nixed her chances to go to the movies as was the plan for our lazy Sunday. Dad’s at cricket all day and I had suggested we finally go and see Toy Story 3. Immediately she wasn’t keen “I want to see Shrek, Toy Story doesn’t interest me”. Interesting. See all I hear there is “I” and “me”, which sucks for her because we have 5 people in this family so it’s never going to be all about her.
Anyway, the inane details of her subsequent spiteful behaviour directed squarely at Sam for no particular reason doesn’t matter. The fact that she seems so intent on choosing the unhappy side of the line and not the positive one is what bothers me most.
So she’s in her room having a little think about it. Meanwhile, the movie won’t be happening because even though on most occasions, I’ve given in (because I usually want to go more than them) I think today it is time to prove my point.
I know this is small fry so far, but I am so scared if I don’t get on top of it from the start, I won’t be able to find my way back in when it matters most.
Yes I anticipated there would be mood swings and teen related grief of some kind, but I guess I just didn’t expect it this soon. There is no way in the freaking world I would have second guessed my mother or slammed my door in a fit of misguided rage at the age of ten.
Or is my memory selective?
I vaguely remember desperately wanting a fluro "Choose Life" shirt and sulking my way into the Guinness World Records when instead she got me a cheaper knock-off midriff top that said “YES” on it. Apparently my mother was a pimp.
There is also photographic evidence of me pulling an atrocious stance outside Dreamworld because I didn’t want to go home. Hmm, maybe Maddison hasn’t fallen so far from the Apple tree after all.
Are these hormones and mood swings fightable though? Or should I just strap myself in and hold on tight?
Love to know of past and present experiences.
|I particularly like wet noodle|