Monday, March 14, 2011

Ahhh, KISS ME






It’s started.  Boys.


Maddison, aged 11, has been invited to attend a theme park with a 13 year old boy for his birthday.  Now this boy isn’t her boyfriend.  He’s her best friend’s boyfriend who has also been invited.   No, it’s the other two boys going that are also 13 that worry me a tad. 


To be honest, 13 is the alarm bell age for me. It might be the whole “teen” element but I think it's because I'm still young enough to remember that this is when shit started to get real at high school.  But Maddie isn’t at High School. Neither are these boys.  They've barely started year 7.   
 

Now I’ve met these kids. They’ve got their hair so sharp it would cut you if you got too close.  Honest to God, they’d be using more Final Net than me in 1988, to keep those razor sharp 'dos' so helmet like.  They seem respectful, calling me Mrs Morley and looking me in the eye.  And granted, these are great signs, but I just don’t know if it’s a goer. 


If I say no, I will be being my own mother who basically held the chastity belt key until I finished High School.  Bad move.  I went wild for a little bit there as a result but I remember only too well, this is the age of the first kiss.


My first kiss was revolting.  Re. Volt. Ing.  Some guy called David at a freaking barn dance.  What’s more telling,  the fact that of my own free will I was at a Barn Dance or that I was kissing a random stranger behind a shed?  He smelled like wet dog and his buck teeth hit my nose before making it to my mouth.  I was holding my breath, more than likely trying to block out the off cheese smell that was coming from his mouth. 


When it was over, all I remember thinking was “thank God I’ve done it.  I’ve kissed a boy”.  So what he was jerk and told me my check shirt made me look like farmer (der dickhead, it’s a BARN DANCE), I’d locked lips, it could only get better.


I can happily say I and it, got better over time.  Not that I was a prolific pasher, but once I realised what all the fuss was about, David Cheesebreath became a thing of the past.


Funnily enough, the little guy that digs Maddie is also called David.  He’s the one that bought her a fake velvet rose and Ferrero Rochers on Valentine’s Day.  He’s also the one who’s started ignoring her in the past week.  Dead giveaway he’s into her. 


So, I haven’t said yay or nay as yet.  It’s proving to be quite the discipline goldmine with many “If you don’t stop with the attitude, you won’t be going to Lachies birthday”.  Empty threats are my speciality.  But if this is going to be a first kiss situation, I'd really better think this through. 


But to be honest, I'm 90% sure she's going to be able to go.  Doesn’t mean I'm not going to dress up as Kenny Koala and inconspicuously follow her around all day...



Stick to the puppy dogs honey




First kiss, tell me about yours.

35 comments:

Chantelle {fat mum slim} said...

I just realised how scary being a mum to a girl is. I think I would have been mean mummy and said no. Or at least made Hubby say it anyway.

You might have to go nude in the suit. I hear they get rather hot. x

Madmother said...

Lordy, I cannot remember my first kiss! So many lips between then and now it is all a little blurred.

BUT - is the hot date whilst you are in Sydney? Bit scary if yes...

So Now What? said...

Haha, I hear you Chantelle. I've since found out his parents are going and staying with them all day. Covertly kissing may be tough for these little Fabios. :)

Annieb25 said...

I often wonder what type of mother I would be if I had a girl. I had the boys. The cheesebreath Davids who encouraged the girls to have their first pash. My concern about letting them go to things like that was "I hope they don't do anything stupid & get hurt". Not once did I think about kissing. Interesting.

So Now What? said...

MM - Ha the only hot date I've got in Sydney is one with the back of my eyelids when I SLEEP IN!!

Annie - My Mum was the same with my brother, so strict with me, he was out smoking Winnie Reds and nightclubbing at 15. I'm gathering it comes down to the fact that he didn't have a uterus ;)

bigwords is... said...

My first kiss was behind a boccedrome at my friend's Italian Club. The guy was hot, the kiss was sweet and very, very quick, but that was the end. One kiss, then nothing. Nadda. No more kissing. Not even talking. Put me off kissing for a long time! But there were some shockers - boys with food stuck in their braces, others with darting tongues - oh my, I gag just thinking about!! With three girls we have a whole world of first kisses ahead of us. Good luck with making your decision!! x

4 kids, 20 suitcases and a beagle said...

Oh God Bern, she is way too gorgeous to let out of the house. Look at those big eyes!

First kiss, a total spunk rat, behind a beach towel that friends were holding up for us. I think it might have got a bit boring half way through, luckily he lived in another town so it was a short lived romance.

Kx

P.S. Just saw your blog comment about traveling so much with an under 5....he was under 5 months, the other 2 were 18 months and 3. It was a freaking NIGHTMARE and this is why I'm allowed to drink as much as I like :-)

Jane said...

Eww cheese breath!!

Mine was BAD. It was actually in the exact spot in my room that I'm sitting right now. One of our friends (who now happens to be my boyfriend!) thought it was pretty pathetic that we'd been dating for a month and still hadn't kissed, so he pushed us into my room and shut the door. Romantic. There was lots of teeth knocking together. Not. Cool.

Maddie's David sounds like a pretty cool dude. Ferrero Rochers are always a winner. But yeah, great idea about following them around in the Kenny Koala suit xxx

Kylie L said...

Bern, in Victoria Year 7 IS high school. Our first kiss age is mandated at grade 5.

At least, that's how old I was. He had braces and tasted like peanut butter, but he did have a cool name (Jesse, in the era of Rick Springfield's "Jesse's girl"). And he kissed me in front of his best mate & my best mate, then we watched them kiss. No wonder I'm a voyeur.

Lucy said...

Oh Mrs Morley. Let her go. I kinda know you will. There was a snap of Maddie on Facebook and she is extraordinarily beautiful and all of a sudden she LOOKS grown up. Let it happen.

My first kiss is being blogged about later.It was delciious.

Lauren Finn said...

As the mother of two girls I shudder at what's coming next - one is almost 12. Based on her mother's history I am in for quite a time......

My first kiss was beautiful (surprising because neither of us knew what we were doing) and I loved that boy until he passed away last year, very young, from a heart attack. While we kept in touch, we both went on to marry other people and lived separate lives. There was much subsequent kissing along the way - a special person to share such a special moment with.

Smudgeblurr said...

Hey Bern,
I remember my first kiss was on year 7 camp - can't remember what time of the year it was but it was at Springfield - i do remember the glo worms and we had to walk FOREVER to get there...
Fond memories... oh and I vote for the Let her go camp!

Wx

Caro Webster said...

Bern, great post. But give a thought to the mother of boys :) My son is 10 and he really likes a girl and she (so we've heard) fancies him. He wants to give her a kiss but is clueless as to how to go about it. I've resorted to giving him kissing lessons (don't worry there are no tongues involved!) and also teaching him how important it is to be gentle and lovely and respectful of her. Secretly I'm hoping that once "the kiss" is done and dusted they can go back to being mates and wait a few more years before attempting it again ;) xx

Belle said...

ahhhhhh My first kiss...so long ago now...and I remember it vividly,I was in 1st form (Year 7), now that's showing my age. I was at a dance in a church hall and met Brett Griffen from Bondi. I was living in Randwick at the time. We snuck outside the dance and slipped around the side of the hall and had a big pash!! It was my first kiss and I remember him telling me what a great kisser I was...tehehehe.

So Now What? said...

Awww, Lauren that is beautiful yet so strikingly sad.

Belle, can I presume Gusset typing came later??

Kylie, Grade 5 you little minx.

Wendy, school camp is happening this year!! She's off to Sydney and Canberra. Eeek.

Lucy, can't wait to read yours.

Go Caro - at least he knows he can approach you about that stuff. I'm lucky Mads is still keeping me updated. Wonder how long that lasts.

Bianca - Harsh, kissed and then spoken to again. You must have wondering what the hell happened.

K - I love the behind the towel. What is with these all in group kisses that go on when kids are younger.

traceyb65 said...

Miss7 broke off her first 'engagement' last year … he made mudpies and told her they were chocolate and. she. believed. him … twice!!! Master11 spent our recent Gold Coast holiday glancing at the meter maids, er actually, the lamborghini BEHIND the meter maids, so i'm safe there for a while.

but i reckon i have 5 years max with Missie before i learn how to wield a gun.

Ms Styling You said...

Clearly, I should count my chickens (if I had any) that my 14 year old is yet to go out with a boy. I know she's keen on one (don't ask me how I know?!) but seems it's all one way. Interesting times ahead.

So Now What? said...

Tracey & Nikki, I do wonder if these boys are as quite into to the dramatics of the boyfriend/girlfriend scene as the girls. Um, I guessing Diary??

Denyse said...

Mum of a daughter..yep! And when you (& I) both presented ourselves for marriage with our daughters in utero..then there's a teensy weensy worry..OMG what if.. Blah blah!
So, here's my version. She isn't you. She's Maddie. She already has the best & most loving parents ever..and she will be remembering your family's closeness & values.
BTW..she is stunning in a maturing way now too, so she needs (without too many jokes) a bit of mum/Mads time.. Casual chats.. Out for a girly arvo tea ..

First kiss -same ..eeeyuu..and in the Barn Dance at a Scout & Guide dance. Have no idea why the kiss, didn't like him.. Probably just decided it would be something to try. Ordinary & so disappointing.

Anonymous said...

Awmeegawd Bern! Maybe I can send Nicholas to chaperone with his girlfriend..Hmmmm...Maybe not! N xx

Trish@Show and Tell said...

I know I'm skipping ahead here, Bern, but as I said on my blog a couple of weeks back...
With sons, you only have to worry about the activities of one penis...
With daughters, you have to worry about the activities of many, many penises.

My first "real" kiss? Pressed up against the side of a Sandman Panel Van with a bloke named Ricky Rice. Yep. Total class!

Trish
xx

Maxabella said...

Bern, I think you've gotta let her have her own bad first kiss moment with spikey helmet head. x

Naomi said...

I have a boy and a girl and I worry equally about them. Sure my son can't get himself pregnant, but he has a heart, and feelings and I know someone will one day break his heart, and consequently, mine. He has told me he is worried about starting high school next year (Vic -year 7) not because of the work, or the homework or any horror story he has heard about heads being flushed in toilets, he told me he's worried about sex, because he doesn't know if he will get it right when it happens... I told him he will work it out when the time comes... but not in grade 7... or 8... at least!
My daughter I am worried about too, but she has more resilience... all I can do for both of them is arm them with as much info as I can and hope they make the right choices. And that when they make the wrong choices they know I will be there for them with open arms.

As for my first real kiss? It was dark, there was ACDC playing, there were roller
skates...

Sarah said...

My first kiss still kind of makes me cringe, I was 14 and it took a while for either of us to get up the courage to do it. I hadn't exactly had a crush on him but my friends set us up & I thought it would be handy to get the first kiss over and done with. I did enjoy it. I say let her go for it, maybe you could have a little chat about boy-girl stuff in general & let her know it is perfectly fine to make boys wait & only do what you want to do...and open up the lines of communication.

Good luck! I feel kinda nervous for you.

Jack McClane said...

Nice post.

I was a boy and my first pash was with a chick called Sonia Swallow and we were both 10. It was at my 10th birthday party at Maccas. After the party, Sonia, my best mate and her best mate found a deserted underground car park and played spin the bottle for hours.

We went out for the year and pashed all the time. It was fun.

I now have a 13 year old daughter and a shot gun. Knowing what we did when we were 10 and she is now 13 (with boobs) terrifies me.

No wonder I am going grey.

cjtato said...

Ugh! I have three girls. I don't remember my first kiss but I am scared. Really, really scared!

Woosang said...

ah good luck with that. SOO Glad I have a boy...

Anonymous said...

Still waiting for mine, I'm only 36!

Michelle

Life In A Pink Fibro said...

How can she be old enough to kiss??? Says she whose first kiss occurred before the age of 8. I tell you, first kiss situations can just sneak up on a girl.

Suz said...

oh gawd.....i so don't want to think about any of this yet. The masters are only 4 and 18 months so i will keep breathing for now. But I'm glad I have someone like you paving a little of the path ahead xx

Glen said...

I'm so glad I've got boys. i just need to keep feeding them cheese puffs and hiding their toothbrushes!

Wombat Central said...

Oh, she is a little doll, and the puppy just upped the cuteness factor exponentially. Make her leave the puppy at home, or all bets will be off. ;)

I remember my first "real" kiss well. I say "real" because the tightly closed mouth pecks I exchanged with my guy BFF in first grade or so don't count.

My junior high first kiss (I think it was 7th grade, now that you mention it) was with this gorgeous boy named Eddie who had a smile as big as Texas. What I didn't factor in before locking lips with Eddie was that this big smile = a big mouth. Pairing that with my tiny mouth wasn't exactly the best match. I feared that at any moment during this tongue fencing match that his jaw might unhinge and and he'd just swallow me whole. Still though, good times. ;)

Bee said...

OMG - my first kiss was just like that - at a party (sort of behind a barn too - in horse stables. It was also RE.VOT.TING!!! I was so glad it was over and only did it as my younger sister also kissed some boy that night. I was 13. I did not go back till I was 15!! Late bloomer - me??

Good luck - I am dreading the days when our little girl asks for the same thing!

Faybian said...

Your daughter might not even be up for the kiss, depends on the kids. If there's plenty of supervision, let her go. They won't get up to too much. Miss 23 and Mstr 20 have been through this and it's just as awkward with either sex, speaking of which,that's much more scary. Miss 10 (soon to be 11) is gorgeous too and isn't interested in any of those that like her. Miss 7 has a (very giggly) crush on some boy she's confided. Thankfully it's just playtime with her atm.
I was (apparently) a late bloomer and had my first kiss at 14. Even though he certainly knew what he was doing I remember being surprised at how easy it was and how it just came instinctively. I tried to convey that to my older kids when they were agonizing over it.

TammyJ said...

Hi. I'm visiting after a tweet from #ausblogcon2011 attendee who claimed you rocked their socks ... or something of the like. Love your blog :)