Do you automatically check out peoples wedding ring finger to see if they are married? I, as a rule, do not and can honestly say, I never have. Apparently though, I am in the minority here. It seems it's quite common, and for a variety of reasons.
- First and foremost, people are sizing up the other person for a potential tune
- Comparison. “If that person can find a person to not only like them, but spend a month of their wages on a big fuck-off engagement ring, then there truly is someone out there for everyone” that gem from an unnamed source.
- Comparison again: the newly engaged are right into rings. It’s all about the cut, the colour and the price.
- People are just nosy fuckers
This week in the news, it was reported that Prince William won’t be wearing a wedding ring when he marries Katey 180 in a couple of weeks.
Now look, I’d understand if like my husband, he has his hand up an S-bend all day long, or had the potential to obliterate it with a wayward hammer blow like a lot of our tradie mates, but let’s be honest, he’s not going to do too much damage to a gold band waving to his peeps from the Royal Balcony or attending a Royal Ball.
It was also while having a conversation with my friend Roberto* during the week, that I even realised that to check out anothers ring finger was an actual “thing”. See, Roberto* is a good looking, single 3o year old guy, who says his ring finger checker-outering is bordering on an obsession. He also went on to say, he actually finds it easier to speak to married women, because they know he’s not there to crack onto them. True dat.
Then, as we were talking, it dawned on me, that for the last, oh, 5 weeks or so, I haven’t been wearing my engagement or wedding rings. And this is because of such a lovely story really. I get dermatitis from the platinum. See, told you it was lovely. It seems, although I have great taste, my body was never quite ready for my highbrow ways and rejects the precious metal on a six monthly basis. But over the last five weeks, has the crack on factor gone up? Um no. In fact, I can honestly say, the attempted pick ups I have been involved in the last 16 years, has rounded out at precisely zero. Oh, wait, except for this one time a lady in my creative writing course decided I was her muse and started to tell me about her erotic dreams that involved me. Yeah, except for her.
So, this got me thinking, is this normal? Do you look at someone’s left hand and take the lack of ring as a green light? Perhaps sspying a wedding band means it’s on like Donkey Kong? Or is the evidence of a wedding band an immediate stop sign. Do not pass go, do not collect $200, do not try and hit on the married person.
Love to know your thoughts.
*Not his actual name. But it sounds like he cleans zee pool right??